im addicted

I used to say that I will never fall into the wickedness of massage and massage salons. I am not just saying that for the hell of it but I have my reasons. First, I am very ticklish that even the slightest contact of the hand on my body will make me squirm like as if I am set on fire. Silly really but that's just how my body reacts. Another thing is, every time I get a full body massage the next day I am sick, literally. With snot running down my nasal orifice and whatnot. Then I remember that at the start of the year I made a New Year's resolution: never say never.

So I confess, I ended up eating my words because now I am addicted to Thai massage. I am still ticklish but its sheer heaven hearing bones cracking (including my body) inside the spa. A bit sado-masochistic but that's just me. I had my full Thai body massage for the fourth time in four straight days. I don't know if that's a good thing or what but I'm enjoying it.

Then last Monday, while I was lying on the mat waiting for the masseuse to shatter my body to fragments, I remember the things I shared with my friends in reference of course to massage since that's what I am writing about now. There's my good friend who every after drinking session goes straight to a massage parlor to get his body caressed, fondled and what not by the masseur and errr.. the rest is too graphic to be talked about here. I just hope you got my drift though.

Then there's my other friend who fell in love with his masseur. Kind of weird really because he had a boyfriend and his lame excuse was he just wants a diversion. Well to each his own. Good thing though he ended the quasi-relationship before went completely bonkers over the guy, else he would be running after his money.

Then I remembered one time, we ended another drinking spree at around 5am in the morning and this friend started looking for an open parlor. Where are we supposed to go at that unholy hour to get a massage? There are a few around the city that are still open but he doesn't want to do it with a masseuse. So we scoured the outskirts of the city and even came to this spa/salon/whore house in A.S. Fortuna in Mandaue City. Thinking that they have masseurs inside because of this huge poster of David Boreanaz half naked we parked outside and asked around.

They charged P1500 for an hour of massage and that includes everything and I don't want to know what "every" includes BUT they don't have any masseurs. Mind you, the moment we entered the establishment we can hear moaning and beds creaking. Upon hearing the welcoming sounds my friend made a dash for the door as if he just got burned. Oh and by the way, in case you might be interested to check out the place it's Duke Massage.

So I guess the world of massage, masseuse and masseurs is like a breathing niche of interesting lives. Kind of like a little underground coven only with more people involved. Errr, scratch that! I suck with analogies. And before I end this post there's this online guy who messaged me who claimed that he's straight and yet he's been offering lingam massage and more for a good 4 years now. As if I'm buying that crap! If you don't know what lingam massage is go figure and let me know your thoughts!

atleast i feel loved.

I feel so loved today. A good friend just came back from her trip from Manila and she got me a pack of hopia with mocha flavor which is kind of weird and at the same time something new to my palate. There's also this pandan flavor which I think tastes better than the mocha ones. Then earlier my mother called me up, initially upset because I haven't been in touch for days (and that's because I didn't buy any prepaid credits for my phone as I hardly make use of it) but in the end told me that she misses me a lot and that she loves me.

Then while inside the cab on my way to work the driver was very kind to ask me if the AC was just ok and that he'll adjust it if I want. Something trivial really but doesn't happen a lot so I say it's worth noting. Then out of nowhere one of the leaders gave me Starbucks coffee. Not really into fancy coffee (and something more expensive than a 3-in-1 Nescafe is already fancy for me) but he gave it for free so why not! Then my seatmate, although she raised her eyebrows at the gesture, gave me some of her rice cakes. So now I have coffee and cakes. Sweet!

Everyone is more than willing to feed me and I don't even look like a malnourished animal. What can I say, I'm easy to please. Before the end of the day I might end up bloated but at least I feel loved!

when I snap, I bite.

Lately, I just feel so snippy that I have the tendency to start biting anyone who gets in my way. From last Friday until last night, I snapped a couple of times. First was when this fling turned into super cheesy friend started bugging me and go drama queen. He texted me asking if I would like to meet up that day to jog. I haven't been feeling well lately so I declined but he made a big fuzz about it saying I have been eluding him for months now. I don't know what he had for lunch that time but he started throwing daggers at me until we had a heated verbal opposition. He lambasted me saying "I am playing hard to get and it's not as if I am good looking enough for him to go loco over." Take that!

I grew my horns right there and then and skewered him to kingdom come. So I sent him a reply: "I know I'm not good looking and what is it to you anyway? I know my worth and how come you keep on asking for sex? If I'm not that hot you would have taken a clue and walked away when I started ignoring you. You are so lame!" I know that sounds too cocky but I felt being defensive. He texted back: "Sorry. It's just that I'm bored and I feel like bugging you." "Yeah right! You can take your boredom up your ass cause I'm not in the mood to play your silly games," I quipped.

Another instance was with this new online friend. He is a blogger that I've seen around but never said hi to and we were supposed to meet up and chitchat over my happy food. I didn't take my dinner that night thinking that we were going to push through with our meet up. So I went to work with an empty stomach. I was a bit ecstatic to finally meet up with another blogger aside from the usual crowd that I hang out with. He was online when I logged in and I confirmed if we are going to push through with the meet up. I don't know what happened but he started telling me that he feels I was just being forced to meet up with him and that I don't really feel like meeting up at all. Errr.. I didn't take my dinner??? We ended up not meeting that night and I don't know if we ever will.

Then last night, my two brothers, my older brother's girlfriend and her two friends decided to go videoke. They arrived late and I felt sorry for my brother for he has been calling her but she is not picking up. She was not in the mood when she arrived and she started whining at my brother. That did it! I snapped again and went after her neck. "If you don't feel like coming you could have informed us ahead of time instead of ruining our night. This was you're idea and I don't appreciate you throwing tantrums when we waited for close to two hours here without a word from you." Then I excused myself and played DOTA to make myself feel better. I was just so annoyed I feel like literally eating her alive.

And that didn't end there. When I paid for my usage at the cafe where I played DOTA, the bitch at the counter started complaining that she doesn't have change for my bill. My eyebrow hit the ceiling and I started growling to warn her that I am to go after her neck. My vitriolic tongue is about to spit acid shit on her face. Good thing she left her post.

My youngest brother then called me up and we met at Jollibee to have my usual happy food for snacks. He told me that I was just so mean to my brother's girlfriend and that she felt humiliated. He was laughing when he told me that my face looks so funny when I'm annoyed. I'm just so transparent that they can feel the tension inside the room. I guess that's just me. I am no good with poker face or what have yous. I just hope this week will be totally different.

fries and sundae: my own brand of happy food

There are times when we feel so defensive and territorial to the point that we get annoyed when other people are hanging around with our friends and our friends opted to join them for a change of environment. Happens a lot really and I guess it's kind of normal for people to feel a pang of jealousy every time they feel abandoned. It's not really that they are being left out or forsaken it's just that it's wise to sometimes detach yourself with the people you usually tag along with. You need to grow and that would mean jumping out of your comfort zones. As they say, familiarity breeds contempt.

We don't really have to limit and have our world revolve around the lives of our friends. Even husbands and wives don't share the same activity everyday, yet they know who they go home to. How much more can you expect from friends? Letting each other broaden horizons is the best thing to do. Though it's natural to sometimes feel a twinge of envy towards those people whom your friends are spending time with, remember that if those people you regard as friends are your real friends then through thick and thin, despite the new acquaintances they meet along the way, they will always put you in the bigger picture.

As to the reason why I'm blabbering again, I remember my other friend last Sunday was a tad disappointed when he saw that one of our friends is hanging around with new faces. Not just that, I am trying to make myself understand as well that really: it's easier said than done. I am in that position right now and I'm currently eating my heart out while looking at my friend's album with her new friends. It's just one of those days when I feel like being selfish and no, I won't tolerate this for long. So I'm off to grab my happy food or junk: fries and sundae.

phone sex anyone???

To each his own they say but I honestly just cannot understand why people gets turned on by phone sex. Owkay, so you're touching yourself while you hear the other person on the other line neigh like a horse in heat but still I cannot fathom where's the fun there.

I would be a total hypocrite if I would say I haven't tried phone sex but I wouldn't say I enjoyed it either and yes, feel free to press the eject button to catapult me to oblivion and I wouldn't care if you wouldn't buy that. So we both came and that's that. How do you explain it? It's that spur of the moment you get when the itch is there and you need release, after which you find yourself asking: what was I thinking?


I remember one time while I used to be with my previous account at our old location and I have an office mate who is so fond with foreigners. She is a lady boy whose past time includes chatting online with other nationalities and having them visit her to show them err.. the beauty of the city. Anyhow, we were at the closing shift that time and one of her "friends" called her up. Since it would be too scandalous to have everyone hear their conversation, she moved to the vacant workstations and continued their little talk. Their little talk turned out to be too naughty that everyone stood up to check her out since she started moaning. She then explained that her boyfriend needs a little fixing and she just gave him what he's asking for. So there!

This morning I woke up early because again, I forgot to switch my phone to silent mode. My phone was ringing like crazy and when I checked who's calling it was one of my flings before who I thought was already partying with the worms six feet under. I haven't heard from him for the longest time. I wonder what he's up to.

I sleepily answered the call and he asked if he just woke me up. I told him that's fine and asked what he wants. He said he just wants to check how I'm doing. After a few minutes he started talking naughty and he blatantly asked me if I'm up to phone sex. He woke me up at 8am to ask me if it's ok to fucking have phone sex with him early in the morning!

I didn't answer him and when he continued talking I pretended I can no longer hear him.

"Hello? Hellooo... Matt, I can't hear you. Hello?? You still there?"

and then I cut the call and of course just to make sure he won't call back, I switched off my phone.

Someone just fucking called me early in the morning to talk crap and pretend he's having sex with me. That's no way to treat someone who's as arid as the Sahara Desert for the longest time. You can take your whining and dirty talk somewhere else. I'm not in the mood to entertain kinkiness and I don't care about your morning wood.

Now, you may ask what's the point of this post. Nothing really, it's just that I'm listening to one of my office mates talking about phone sex while having dinner.