i hate it when i forget to turn off my phone before bedtime

Posted by eye_spy | Posted in , | Posted on 10:16 AM

6

My phone rang and I sleepily answered it. I checked the time and it's 9AM!! On the screen was an unregistered number. Who the eff is this? I groggily answered the call and on the other line was the voice of a woman who's name I can no longer remember.

Me: Hello?
Lady: Hi! I'm actually calling from Citibank to do background check for Miss X. Do you know her? We have your name here as one of her references.
Me [sounding annoyed]: Yes. She's a friend. What's this? A credit card application?

She asked a series of questions which I grumpily answered as she just woke me from my kinky dream. One thing that I noticed was she's using three languages while on the phone with me. She switches from English to Filipino to Bisaya.Now I'm getting suspicious. I'm a skeptic. Then another funny thing happened, the sound of a child crying came into the background.

That was the time I asked her if she's really calling from CitiBank. She opted to ignore my question.

Lady: Is Miss X living with someone right now?
Me: Is that relevant to her application? If it is, then that should be in the form that she completed right?
Lady: OK. So do you know someone could be another reference for Miss X?
Me: What? That should be in the form she filled out!
Lady: Right, sorry. May I ask for her contact number please?
Me [really annoyed]: Listen lady, what's with the questions? She hasn't changed her number you know. If you're really calling from CitiBank and she filled out a form, everything should be there. How did you get my number in the first place? Now if you don't have any other silly questions, I'm going back to sleep.
Lady: Sorry to bother you sir and thanks for the time.

I asked Miss X about it and she was completely clueless. She didn't apply for any credit cards and she'll never will. I still have the number of the caller so I gave it to her. Had her iron out things.

Sorry lady, you got the wrong timing to call me. Had it been that you dialed at the right time, I could have been more accommodating and probably might tell you something about Miss X --- or not!

thanks for making me laugh so hard

Posted by eye_spy | Posted in , , | Posted on 6:29 AM

10


It's never nice to laugh at the downfall of others but sometimes there are instances when you just can't help but smile to prevent yourself from rolling on the floor while laughing your heart out.

Earlier today instead of going to sleep by the time I got home, I decided to just go to National Bookstore at Mango Avenue. I was so pissed off that I need to go out, instead of locking myself in my room. I need to think, I have to breathe. Looking at the arrays of books with their haughty price tags helped a lot.

Since I'm on a tight budget I just satisfied myself with looking at those pricey books but eventually I gave in and grabbed another copy of "How To Kill A Mocking Bird" before I stepped out of the bookshop.

Then I saw the person who made my day. Wearing a shirt with a Superman logo emblazoned in front. Not really the very good looking type but he is screaming with sex. He has a body of a Greek god and I happen to know that he is a PLU because I've seen him once at Doce partying like there's no tomorrow.

So I followed him with my eyes while he and his friend crossed the street carrying a bag of food from Jollibee. They look so happy together, laughing while traversing the pedestrian lane. Halfway through the street, the lights turned green and traffic started moving. Between the pavement and the pedestrian lane is mud and there is a need for them to hop over it to get to the safe side.

Unfortunately, Lady Luck didn't smile at him. They, beating the red light and the sight of mud on the street spelt disaster. Like a movie played in slow motion his right foot missed the pavement, he slipped and spaghetti went flying out of the bag. His partner started laughing so hard and I stopped on my track and just completely looked at them.

The funny thing was his right slipper got stuck on the mud that he has to yank it out of the puddle. He started limping like he just stepped on a pile of shit while carrying his dirt covered flip flop. That was unfortunate really but you gave me a good laugh that I was still laughing while I was inside the jeepney on my home. The lady in front of me eyed me queerly but I didn't care. That made me feel a bit better. Not nice really but what can I do? I'm no superhuman!

this is what i do when im bored..

Posted by eye_spy | Posted in , | Posted on 9:29 PM

8

For lack of better things to do, I started answering some of the surveys/quizzes in facebook. I stumbled on this test entitled: ANONG KLASENG LIBOG MERON KA? Interesting..

Let me see if this thing can really guess what kind of animal lies within. So I started answering a series of questions and low and behold:
SOBBBRAAAANG LIBOG MO

Ikaw yung tipo ng tao na alam ng lahat ang mga sexlife mo at ang mga nagagawa mo na sa buhay mo. Konting haplos lang libog na libog ka na. Madalas kang nakikipagsex, at sarap na sarap ka dito.

Could it be that this is true? Lol! I wish it is unfortunately I'm still on a hiatus right now. Or could it be that this is something zapped from the future? Hmmm...

when the animals in the circus go wild

Posted by eye_spy | Posted in | Posted on 4:20 PM

3


The downside of being someone in position is when you show the slightest sign of weakness, everyone tries to peck at you. Too much expectations set. I know I was being mean but with how things went, I say you asked for it. I enjoyed looking at you being skewered and you squirmed as the spotlight zoomed in on you. You were on a tight spot and I, I don't have any plans of covering your ass this time.

It's a dog eats dog world and you're not supposed to act like Reese Witherspoon (read: Legally Blonde). I understand that you may not know everything but you brushing their questions off as if you don't give a rat's ass won't help cause the more you ignore them, the more they want to go after your neck.

It's a circus out there and you are the ring master. Strike and whip the lions too hard and you'll run into the risk of getting attacked. Be gentle and be kind and you'll see them jumping from one ring of fire to another.

Different strokes for different folks. May this day be a learning point for you. Until the next show...

stop right there!

Posted by eye_spy | Posted in , , , | Posted on 1:12 PM

10

While I was happily biting on my burger while listening to some songs online, he popped in. It's been awhile since I last heard from him and I'm happy for the lack of communication. It's over and there's no point talking.

I tried ignoring him but I forgot I'm not in invisible mode. I told him I'm having my lunch and I'm at work. He said he just wants to talk. I know he will eventually drop a bomb so I braced myself. I'm kind of getting used to his style. And then he dropped the explosives. He asked if I can go out for awhile and meet up with him. What's the point? It's over and I'm at work.

Before he could even say another word, I told him "No! I don't want to." I've reached the finish line and though I want to see him, I was glad I was able to contain myself. Too often, going after what feels good means letting go of what is right. I don't want to go over the same shit again. My tearducts are too proud to cry you a river again.

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