To each his own they say but I honestly just cannot understand why people gets turned on by phone sex. Owkay, so you're touching yourself while you hear the other person on the other line neigh like a horse in heat but still I cannot fathom where's the fun there.
I would be a total hypocrite if I would say I haven't tried phone sex but I wouldn't say I enjoyed it either and yes, feel free to press the eject button to catapult me to oblivion and I wouldn't care if you wouldn't buy that. So we both came and that's that. How do you explain it? It's that spur of the moment you get when the itch is there and you need release, after which you find yourself asking: what was I thinking?
I remember one time while I used to be with my previous account at our old location and I have an office mate who is so fond with foreigners. She is a lady boy whose past time includes chatting online with other nationalities and having them visit her to show them err.. the beauty of the city. Anyhow, we were at the closing shift that time and one of her "friends" called her up. Since it would be too scandalous to have everyone hear their conversation, she moved to the vacant workstations and continued their little talk. Their little talk turned out to be too naughty that everyone stood up to check her out since she started moaning. She then explained that her boyfriend needs a little fixing and she just gave him what he's asking for. So there!
This morning I woke up early because again, I forgot to switch my phone to silent mode. My phone was ringing like crazy and when I checked who's calling it was one of my flings before who I thought was already partying with the worms six feet under. I haven't heard from him for the longest time. I wonder what he's up to.
I sleepily answered the call and he asked if he just woke me up. I told him that's fine and asked what he wants. He said he just wants to check how I'm doing. After a few minutes he started talking naughty and he blatantly asked me if I'm up to phone sex. He woke me up at 8am to ask me if it's ok to fucking have phone sex with him early in the morning!
I didn't answer him and when he continued talking I pretended I can no longer hear him.
"Hello? Hellooo... Matt, I can't hear you. Hello?? You still there?"
and then I cut the call and of course just to make sure he won't call back, I switched off my phone.
Someone just fucking called me early in the morning to talk crap and pretend he's having sex with me. That's no way to treat someone who's as arid as the Sahara Desert for the longest time. You can take your whining and dirty talk somewhere else. I'm not in the mood to entertain kinkiness and I don't care about your morning wood.
Now, you may ask what's the point of this post. Nothing really, it's just that I'm listening to one of my office mates talking about phone sex while having dinner.
I havent been blogging lately as I am just too caught up with sleeping and running and playing badminton and errr, more sleeping. Friends already asked me whats with another blog hiatus and I just shrug the question off saying I don't feel like writing lately.
Today is actually an exception as this morning made me really really happy that I am compelled to write a short note about it.
Our department/account is looking for another officer and the search ended the other day. Today the news went out and much to the dismay, consternation, dread and whatnot of the other leaders, it was my friend who snatched the position dangling in front of the noses of their friends who vied for the position.
I was listening to the song Keep on Moving earlier and the song was playing on a loop while I was happily chatting with my Pok. I guess the song was pretty timely (really!) because my friend who was about to throw in the towel gave it another shot as I pleaded (and I know he is not the type who just quits that easily) and the effort paid off.
He was about to leave the company and start anew in Manila because he thinks a new beginning is what he needs (I say he just wants to go there because he is gaga over Max and he is just itching to see him in the flesh but that's TMI already and I know he will kill me for this.).
I am just so glad that I wasn't able to contain my excitement, I rushed to their floor (and I almost bumped on the glass door) to congratulate him instead of sending out an email. So there! Congratulations my dear friend and welcome to hell another endeavor. This calls for a celebration so bring out our friends Jose and Absolut.
"Monogamy is a myth that has been rammed down people's throats for far too long. The inability to be monogamous isn't just a matter of excess hormones or vanity, but, as all research indicates a genetic configuration in almost all animals."
"David Barash, Professor of Psychology at the University of Washington in Seattle said that the only species in nature that doesn't commit adultery and in which there seems to be one hundred percent monogamy is a flatworm, DiplozoonParadoxum. The male and female worms meet as adolescents and their bodies literally fuse together."
from the Winner Stands Alone --- Paolo Coelho.
Interesting.. I should stop whining and complaining about why those guys I used to go "steady" with just can't keep their dicks inside their pants. One "friend" even came up with that reason saying he's just a guy and testosterone level is too high, overflowing even. I guess I'd rather see them as energizer bunnies running and humping around than become a flatworm and be one with them for all eternity. Oh well, I'll just let them live their lives as they see it fit. *sigh*
In the meantime I'll just heed Katy Perry's line: "There's tons of fish in the water, so the water I will test." So off to the ocean I go.
Who in his right mind would try to hijack an 18,000 tonne, 525 foot command vessel and fuel tanker in the Indian Ocean? Well those Somali Pirates were audacious enough to raid this monster ship thinking that what's in front of them is a commercial vessel. I'm pretty sure they were scared shitless when they figured that their nightmare is floating afront looming like Goliath over David. This story cracked me up!
"Eighty-four, Becauseat that age, you don't have to work anymore, and you can spend
all your time loving each other in your bedroom."(Judy, 8)
CONCERNING WHY LOVERS OFTEN HOLD HANDS
"They want to make suretheir rings don't fall off because they paid good money for
them."(Dave, 8)
In one of my posts, I told the story about one of my friends who was kinky as hell. Well she just got married. The interesting part is, she married someone she met online. They've been chatting for a month and whoopeydoo they tied the knot days after the guy got here. So if you are to think of it, they really just know each other in less than two months. Who on earth would like to get hitched in a span of less than two months from the time you started chatting? Well she did. To each his own they say.
Now the reason why I'm blabbering about her again is not because I find her real cool and that I'm hoping someday my time will come and I will go gaga over someone and just drag my ass to who knows where and get married. In a way I am still conservative and honestly find what she did as totally kooky. It's because along the line of flirting and having hot sex with the guy she sealed the deal with, someone got hurt (guy B). Now I am not throwing stones at her as I don't really know the other guy but with how she shared the whole hullabaloo, feeling guilty and with misty eyes I cannot help but feel for the other guy (guy B).
You see Mr-as-crazy-as-my-cuckoo-friend (the one she married and I will be referring to as guy A) went back to US already. So my friend is left here by herself not having any inkling at all as to what lies after marriage and after she took the name of guy A. Guy B who got hurt actually came first in her life and she just threw away everything to the wind after guy A decided to come and visit her. She said she just got tired of him.
So to make the complicated and long story short, Guy B didn't know that she just got married and she has no plans of telling him either. She tried breaking up with him but he is still clinging to the hope that she will change her mind and thinks that what's happening to them is just a petty misunderstanding. The day before she got married she received a notice about the fiancee visa that Guy B applied and she was really caught off guard and started feeling guilty about the whole thing.
Now the saddest part is she tried persuading Guy B to go back to the consulate and cancel everything. Guy B said he went there three times but he just can't do it and that the moment he steps in the office he immediately opens the door and walk away. He is asking for another chance and promised to be better. I was there when he made the phone call and I can't help but just look the other way to hide the fact that I feel so sad about the entire thing. In a way my heart also got broken that night.
She has her reasons but I really feel sorry for the guy. I guess I'm just overly emotional but really after what they've been through she just traded everything for someone she hardly knows. I am not putting down my foot and say she made the wrong decision because whether she did or she did not, it's her life that she is leading anyway. I
I guess I'm just saddened by the fact that she took off the ring that Guy B gave her and exchanged it for another ring studded with diamonds from Guy A. Marriage is no light matter that you can just flippantly get in to and jump overboard once you get tired of it. While there are others who are just so damn desperate to get bagged least get taken seriously, others are having the time of the their lives breaking the hearts of others.
I was supposed to write about how I spent my Saturday as promised, to entertain two of my friends but I will digress. I want to tell both of them though that as usual on a Monday, I hadn't had enough sleep. However something interesting happened earlier today and after quite sometime I got back on my feet and started dating. It's not really something fancy but it's nice to feel like the princess on a white horse again. Like Rapunzel up in the tower waiting for my prince charming to shout my name and I, I will let down my non-existent tresses so he can give it a tug and climb the parapet to see me. That's just me letting my imagination run wild -- again.
It's been awhile since I last dated and it's nice to meet up with someone not in bed but somewhere else where physical contact is not that possible under the scrutinizing eyes of the public. A touch of the hand under the table every now and then, holding your arms when he gets the chance to. Things that I haven't been doing with someone aside from friends. It's giving me the high that I would like to do it again and I'm still recalling the experience until now. So eat your hearts out my dear friends.
On second thought, since I love my friends that much and I always try to keep my promises I will have them cannibalize my not so good Saturday. So I received a message from this guy with abs to die for in one of those dating sites (read: booty call/messaging site). So anyhow he wanted to meet up and since he's a hotshot, I didn't have the heart to turn him down because I'm really kind to cuties like him. When he called me on the phone and asked if I can drop by his hotel I literally had the cab flew to his location.
We met up at the hotel lobby and he invited me first for coffee which I graciously declined. He sure is an eye candy and my x-ray vision was totally scanning him up and down. Just when I thought I will get laid after being arid as the Sahara desert, Lady Luck turned her back at me and in comes this elderly Caucasian. He just sat in front of me nonchalantly and went down to business. I was flabbergasted when I knew that they were a couple and they wanted to have a menage a trois with moi. No can do, not my thing and definitely not with a very old guy who's as old as my grandpa. Imagine that, my grandpa is already 79!!!
Then he donned on this business-like tone and said he is willing to pay $100. Are you effing kidding me? I just puked in my mouth! The old geezer wants my ass for $100! So I stood up and look him in the eye.
"No offense but sex is no trade for me and I don't dig geriatrics."
I straightened my dress, grabbed my purse and went on clippetyclops with my 4 inch Manolo heels. Kiss my ass you cheap prehistoric critter!
I don't really want to go into the details as that would be TMI. I'm hoping though that Mr-Eye candy-with-abs-to-die-for will call me again and see me sans the old fart. I can only imagine me and him on a date. Gawd! I just heard my heart go thump-thump in my chest.
The youngest brother of my friend is getting married soon. Last Saturday night, their entire family went to Ayala to have dinner with the girl's family and to formally ask for the girl's hand. Knowing the paranoid Tinkerbell in my friend, he sent me an SMS.
Ron: I hope no one who knows me will see me in Ayala with my family.
Me: You're just scaredthat they will approach your family and tell them that you're a full-fledged faerie outside your house.
Ron: That's the thing cause if someone will start bitchin around I will definitely come out of the closet and bitch back.
Me: You should have brought your feather boa with you and start sashaying inside the mall like Tyra Banks.
Ron: Our youngest brother is getting married and as expected I will be interrogated about my love life (or lack thereof) and plans of settling down.
Me: That's it! Lest your parents will push you to join the bandwagon, you have to confess to them that you prefer dicks over chicks. Or do you also dig chicks with dicks? Lol.
Ron: Labad!
He will be the only one in the family who hasn't settled yet -- or decided if he will eventually. Don't worry my friend, we will be here and we can grow old together downing barrels of vodka and what have yous.
I was asked to come to work early today because they need someone to sit in for the interview of the new hires we need. Knowing that I haven't gotten enough sleep, my supervisor bought me coffee. On our way up from the coffee shop, I saw someone in the lift that somehow made me wide-eyed and sweaty as if someone just pushed the panic button and I go around running in circles, screaming as if my hair is on fire.
I never expected to see this person ever again. The deal has been sealed and he's just one those flings you have when the itch is there. No strings attached, they say. I don't know what's more awkward. Him seeing me and calling me by the "name" I gave him or my manager looking at me with a questioning look and asking me later on who the guy was. I tried to sound nonchalant about it and lied that he's a friend of a friend and we got introduced during those days when I go home completely wasted. I think she took the bait.
So we headed to the interview room and started asking the litany of questions. Then, unexpectedly, he came in. Oh-em-gee.. please give me a break! He looked so composed and cool that I asked myself, what if he will make it and he will become my office mate? NO! NO! NO! This will be the demise of my facade as the ever-pure-never-been-touched-never-been-kissed-celibate! This is so not happening. You are so not unmasking me today.
I hardly talked the entire time while he was being skewered by my manager. He just smiled and answered the question while I evilly snickered inside my head at the same time avoiding his stares.
I will burst your bubble!
Then it's my turn to ask the questions and of course since they delegated me to asked some technical questions regarding the support, I shot him some tricky queries -- which he failed to answer.
He stepped out of the room and we delegated as to whether or not we will accept him or endorse him to another room for another account interview. Of course, you know the answer to that. It's not just because I don't want him in the account (that's just a morsel of my reasons) but really he's not the profile we are looking for. I pointed out my views and my boss took those into consideration.
He came back in and she delivered the coup de grace.
Please proceed to the next room Mr. ____. We will be endorsing you for another account interview. Thank you so much for your time!
